The Schmidlap Story
You see, it all started when Ma Schmidlap, Pa Schmidlap, Grandma Schmidlapp,
Sister Anne and Brother Earl decided to travel to Ottawa in July of 1997 to
see Daughter Schmidlap, who was employed there as an Oversized Nutcracker. As they were travelling under the aliases Polly
Mitchell (now Grotzki), J.T. Mitchell, Natalie Ivey, Anne Ward, and Earl
Grotzki, reservations were made at Greyhound Air (one of the 5 or so flights
that actually got off the ground) under these names. Ma Schmidlap phoned
Greyhound Air to confirm the reservations and gave her reservation number to
the charming young man on the other end of the phone line. We are CERTAIN
he wanted to say "Of course, Mrs. [insert name here], we have your
reservation right here!". Instead, he got a reservation that looked
something like this:
Following this, there was a pregnant pause, after which he said
triumphantly, "This must be the Schmidlap family...". Great Schmidlaps!!
We'd been discovered!!!
Well, after that, there was no hiding it. Upon arrival in Ottawa, the
Schmidlaps successfully met up with Daughter Schmidlap, who was cavorting
around Ottawa under the alias Musician Mitchell. Due to her work
commitments, she was not able to join the family on their escapades around
Ottawa, however, the Schmidlaps did successfully meet up with Cousin Don
(now located in Calgary) and Cousin Ryan (still located in Ontario), and
also some of the long-lost Schmidlap-Jacklin Cousins - Sue, Eric and Keith
(also located in Ontario). (Take note there are now 10, yes, 10, Schmidlaps
traveling around Ottawa as a group.) The adventure continued....
The Schmidlaps took in many of the sights and sounds of Ottawa in August,
including the Royal Canadian Mint. Prices for the Mint range from a
student/senior price, adult price, and family price. Pa Schmidlap arrived
first at the ticket window to cajole our way in. There was no hassle
whatsoever! The lovely lady at the counter simply asked, "Are you a
family?", to which Pa Schmidlap responded, "Yes!".
There have been several other Schmidlap adventures since then. In August of
2001 Daughter Schmidlap experienced a camping weekend with Cousin Don &
Cousin Ryan, involving Adventures
With The Schmidlap
Children, and some
various encounters with the locals - squirrels and raccoons.
Daughter Schmidlap and Cousin Ben are often mistaken for brother and
sister, and frequently make vain attempts to take over Edmonton's
nightlife ( Schmidlap Children
At Play), although Cousin Ben's real sister is Cousin
Cousin Bill has not yet tamed the Schmidlaps sufficiently to appease his two
holy terrors, cats Calamity & Tab Terrific. Perhaps someday!
A Schmidlap family dinner usually occurs two to three times a year - give or
take - at Thanksgiving, Christmas and Easter (The Royal Schmidlaps). Dinners
usually involve a good deal of cooking on either (or both) Ma Schmidlap's,
and Sister Anne's part and some potluck from everyone else. Wine flows
freely, and by the end of the night, Pa Schmidlap and Cousin Bill are all
but throwing buns at each other. Be sure to learn How To Make Schmidlap
Coffee, a fine result of a Schmidlap family dinner!
And, of course, no Schmidlap dinner would be complete without a visit from
the Royal Schmidlap Harem....
During this past year, many events have happened in the life of many
Schmidlaps! Daughter Schimdlap has returned to Edmonton after a failed
attempt to convert the population of Atlanta to Schmidlap standards. A
short visit to Ottawa and Montreal involved an afternoon of poutine & beer
(Eric & Keith), who are currently at large in Ottawa, Ontario.
got married in September 2004, adding another member to the Schmidlap family
(did he have any idea what he was getting into??). Welcome, Cousin
Cousin James became
tired of constantly repairing his crumbling house, and proceeded to level it
and built a new one. Details on the beginning demolition stages can be
found at the Schmidlap National
Sport page! Cousin Ben has moved out of
the basement he was holed up in, and is planning a small Schmidlap invasion
of Ireland sometime in the next year.
In mid-April 2005, Ma Schmidlap celebrated her [age classified]
birthday! A suitable celebration was held in true Schmidlap fashion,
and, to top off the evening, Ma Schmidlap announced the arrival of a
gift from a long lost family member! Long-lost Brother Chris (picture
unavailable) emerges as
the Not-So-Grand Poobah...read his Epistle!
Daughter Schmidlap has returned to Edmonton and has relocated from the
apartment to a house
with a yard and a garage, and Cousin Ben has acquired a new job, but is
remaining in Edmonton for the time being. Cousin James has moved into his brand new
house, but has yet to conduct a Schmidlap tour of his new digs.
**NEW** The Meaning of Schmidlap
Brother Earl did a little searching, and somehow, somewhere, in the great
abyss of the World Wide Where-the-heck-did-you-find-that? , managed to
locate a theory on the name Schmidlap. The theory states that Schmidlap/Schmidlapp is, in
rumour, an amalgamation of names. Who would have thought?
The Schmidlaps are primarily based in Edmonton, Alberta, with a small
contingent in Southern Ontario. We are sorry to announce that Grandma
Schmidlapp is no
longer with us, but we feel certain that she is watching over our every move
to ensure every Schmidlap family event goes according to Schmidlap standard!
You will notice the spelling of her name is different. You see, Grandma
Schmidlapp was from the Old Country, and when the New Generation was born,
the second 'p' was dropped from our last name...
Meanwhile, the Schmidlaps continue on in true Schmidlap fashion....updates
will happen whenever the webmaster has time!